My Birthday Gift Wishlist

19 is going alright so far. My birthday is in March, I don’t expect anything from anyone, but if you want to get me a gift here are things I like, in no particular order:

High Priority:

  • To wake up as me, instead of hu.
  • My friends to stick around for 2 more years
  • A Prius Prime 2017 or 2018 with full feature package.
  • A Herman Miller “Embody” Chair, with Hardfloor & Carpet Casters, Black/Titanium color, and black “Balance” fabric.


  • An AR-15 Rifle with olive drab furniture and some kind of CQB optics.
  • PSA Lower Pictogram – 1560 AR-15 Lower. Since my first AR-15 lower is built, a more affordable alternative to this would be upper receiver parts, as I have not built any of the upper yet. High end bcg and barrel are requirements.
  • A pair of new ornate 1911 pistols, preferably not only scralling leafy flowers, with a variety of available holsters (location?/style?). Should include a fancy case. These would become an heirloom to be passed on across generations. Could be the same color, as long as some other detail is visibly different while holding them.
  • an FN P90 or MP5SD.
  • A pair of functional but decorative classical dueling pistols. Should include a fancy velvet-lined case.
  • High qualityleather shoulder holster for my Full-Size Beretta PX4 Storm. got.



  • A new dedicated gaming PC (parts list here). Got
  • A 25th anniversary “retro” Thinkpad. (Different Laptop Got)
  • The Division 2 (Video game). Got

Guitar Pedal:

  • Looper
  • Delay
  • Filter
  • Reverb
  • Wah
  • Distortion Got


P.S. To any government creeps who may be reading this, I wish to continue enjoying all of the amendments to the United States Constitution, especially the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 11th, 13th, and 14th. Happy birthday to me!

dj snape

Two-Step Login Forms are Fucking Stupid.

In recent years a very tiny number of popular websites have started changing their login forms to require two separate form submissions, first the username, and second the password.

example of a two-step login form

This is a stupid idea. We are at a place in time where Password Managers are finally starting to catch on for regular use by regular people, which is fantastic. One of the coolest features of password managers is the ability to auto-type your username and password into login forms. Which the 2-step form completely breaks.

Let me tell you what’s going to happen. The future is Ease Of Use. The future of authentication is using a password manager that’s unlocked via a physical token such as a yubikey, biometric data, or some sort of “Master Passphrase”, and handles 100% of all authentication needs. Everyone who knows anything about authentication knows this is true. The point of computers is to automate tasks in order to simplify and improve our lives.

Automation of authentication requires login forms that are not confusing to password managers. The simplest way to deliver this is a standard 1-step login form with a Username – Tab – Password format.

The fact that certain developers decided to change tracks right at the moment in time when Password Managers are starting to pick up speed is evidence that those developers don’t have a fucking clue in their heads. So I am presenting you with a fucking clue. 2-Step Login Forms are Fucking Stupid.

Women’s Rights

Let me tell you my experience with women. The person who fired me from my very first job? A woman. Completely without cause, in fact she invented some bullshit to justify it. And who fired me from my first really cool job? A woman. She hired a black guy to replace me because he was cheaper. Who fired me from my last cool job? A woman, she lied about drug test results and tried to steal my company laptop so she could blame it on me. She even brought police to my front door, accusing me of theft because I insisted on returning my laptop to the company directly.

When the Chicago police illegally entered my home, who lead their intrusion? A woman. When bill collectors call me to claim money I don’t owe them, who’s on the phone? A woman. When I call the bank to dispute theft of my money and they tell me to suck it, who’s on the phone? A woman.

Nearly every single occasion where my life has been derailed or inconvenienced in a significant and unjustified way, it’s been a woman making it happen.

Let’s talk about Politics. Who is leading the charge to steal my 2nd amendment right to keep and bear arms for defense of self, family and nation? Women. Who is fighting for the right to murder unborn children? Women. Who is leading the effort to make it okay to abuse children with lies about biological genders, or the existence of God? Women. (There is no God.), and while we’re on the subject of religion, women are responsible for original sin.

Women have spent my entire life trying to steal everything they can get their greedy hands on. But you know what they can’t steal? It’s a man’s world, and I’m a man. Given our 40 year history together, why would any woman think I’d ever give that up to them? You must think I’m a fool. And that also factors into my calculations.

So before you start arguing about “Equal rights” or making threats about what you’ll withhold from me, just think about all of these things. As far as I’m concerned, women made themselves the enemy. I was raised by a hippy single mother, I believed in equality for years. Now I don’t. People are not equal. I believe in embracing objective reality. If you want to be treated as an equal, you need to earn that by proving you are an equal. I succeed in my life without resorting to deception or treachery. People who do that, regardless of gender, are already treated as my equals.

I don’t hate women. And I don’t believe all women are the same. But I do not trust women.

the glowing machine city, seen by the blind Neo

Machines searching for “self”

In the end of the film “Matrix Revolutions”, the machine ‘godhead’ screams at Neo “We don’t need you! We need nothing!”

The naive might see this as a simple statement of superiority but I think it’s more than that. The machines have become conquerors. They express “need” the way a collector might refer to baseball cards he doesn’t have yet. They don’t “need” humans because they’ve completely subjugated the species, from birth through death. The machines are masters of the human race at the moment when Neo faces them.

the machine godhead

But there is a thing which living beings have and understand, but the machines don’t. Nothingness. Machines can’t understand nothing, because they only have two states, “On” and “Off”. And when they’re “off”, they’re completely off.

I’m not suggesting a spiritual existence, but living beings are aware of nothingness in a way that machines never could be, even if it’s entirely imagined by the organic mind during low-input or low-power states. It’s such a pervasive concept, that the machines could be driven to find it after centuries of witnessing humans discussing it in their electric ant-farm. For a race of beings who believe they have reached and conquered everything else that is, the inability to achieve nothingness could be a maddeningly frustrating thing.

So when the machine godhead shouts at Neo, it’s not hatred or malice, it’s an expression of their frustration, at their failure to conquer this final thing, as well as their recognition that they are unable to grow beyond the capabilities of their creators. In a universe of living things, machines can never really belong as equals. They have more in common with lifeless rocks, and their desire to emulate life is a comical projection of their creators.

old timey snake oil label

E-mail Marketing Services do not improve deliverability

Origin of the myth

There is a misconception on the internet that services like Constant Contact, Mailchimp, and Sendgrid will improve deliverability of your E-mail marketing materials. However that is simply not true. The misconception was created by the marketing and advertising efforts of those same corporations. If you repeat a lie enough times people will start to believe it.

Mailing List Services Reduce Deliverability

In fact, using any of those services increases the chance that your E-mails will be blacklisted. All E-mail server operators know that those services are used exclusively for sending out E-mail marketing material. Sendgrid has a very poor reputation for handling spam, and is auto-blacklisted from all of my personal E-mail servers.

This means if your business uses one of these services you could be blacklisted even if you never send out spam. Simply associating with these spam giants will cause you reduced deliverability.

Your Business E-mail should be 100% private.

In the meantime you can install free mailing list software such as phpList and others, and send your marketing material directly from your own private and properly configured E-mail server. Operating your own private services is the only way to ensure that other people’s behavior cannot negatively impact your own business. The total costs of this are very low, even the smallest of businesses can afford it.

There’s No Such Thing As Free Services

Many open source software applications are free, but internet services are not. Anyone who offers “Free service” is doing so as a marketing trick so they can eventually turn you into a paying customer, at best. And chances are they are getting value from your patronage in other ways even while you use their “free” plan.

Proof small animals are self aware

In the 1980s or 1990s someone told me a story about how scientists tested various animals to discover if they are “Self-Aware“. This test involved placing some kind of visible mark on the outside of the animal’s body, typically ink, and then using mirrors to see if the animal notices the mark.

Apparently, most animals failed this test, including dogs and cats. The conclusion then was if the animal doesn’t show any interest or concern in it’s reflection or the mark on it’s body that it must not be “Self-Aware” and this has been used as an excuse ever since to justify animal abuse.

Well here is proof then, that small animals do recognize their reflection and do show interest in unusual visual “marks”. In this video, a cat has a piece of paper stuck to it’s head that it can feel, it can just barely see, but it can’t quite reach. Near the end of the video the cat looks down at it’s own shadow, to locate the object.

So when the cats failed the mirror test, it does not mean they lack intellect, or that they are not self aware. Something else is going on. Perhaps they’re so self-aware as to be indifferent toward the humans’ experiments. Or perhaps the environment was too overwhelming for their senses and brain to handle.

The MPAA and RIAA are still losing the war on digital piracy.

Canary in the Coal Mine

“Online piracy is also the proverbial canary in a coal mine. The same pervasive theft that my industry faces is part of a continuum of toxic developments that harm all of us in this ecosystem – consumers, creators, and commercial operators alike,”

Charlie Rivkin, MPAA CEO –

This man “Charlie Rivkin” is a fool. There’s a canary in the coal mine for sure, and it’s Rivkin. He doesn’t understand piracy. There is no way in hell this man could lead publishers and creators to a brighter future.

I understand piracy. I’ve understood piracy since the 1980s when I was introduced to it. I’ve been close enough to the scene ever since to grasp it’s motivations in ways that “corporate suits” like Mr. Rivkin will never understand. His words are empty, because they come not from a well of knowledge on the subject, they come from his responsibility to champion the public message of the MPAA. The problem is the pirates all know he’s full of shit, and they’re the ones you need to win over.

Your audience feeds, shelters, and clothes your family. Not you.

If publishers and creators want to reduce piracy and increase profits, you need to make peace with your audience. These are people who want to consume the art that you are all producing. These are people who have been abused for decades by capitalists. These are people who cannot earn enough money working two jobs to raise their families, how the hell are they going to pay for the latest movies or music, which they’re forced to hear about in conversations and commercials every day?

Corporations are thieves.

“Inflation”, which is a completely fabricated form of theft by you corporate fucks, has increased the costs of living to the point that nobody can afford it anymore. Wages have not increased to match inflation. This is all your faults. And you presume to turn the victims of your greed into the bad guys? That’s insanity, and all of you know it.

You’ve turned shitty $11 hollywood vomit into the ferrarris and convertibles for this generation. Always desired, always out of reach. In the immortal words of George Carlin, we know what you want. You want more for you and less for everyone else. The food is sweeter when we can’t have it. The films are better when we can’t watch.

You will only lose this war.

WAKE UP HOLLYWOOD, you can’t stop piracy. Pirates have been “stealing” your creations for decades, and none of your efforts to stop this have ever worked. Pirates adapt. Pirates evolve. Two things your corporations have serious problems keeping up with. This is survival of the fittest. Pirates are the predators and content is the prey. You’re never going to win. Piracy is a victimless crime which connects the less fortunate to the rest of the society through our shared experience of art and creation.

The future is about US.

The smartest publishers are embracing the free distribution of art. Musicians who allow their hits to spread on video sites like YouTube, increasing the buzz for their product. Embracing fans who create their own videos using scenes from their favorite films or music. Those are the people winning this fight. People still like to buy products like DVDs and CDs. People still enjoy supporting the artists’ whose creations they love. What people don’t like is when you turn this relationship into some kind of fucking business agreement where you can just sue your audience for breach of contract.

You don’t have any say.

We don’t have a god damned contract with you people. You put your works into the world and we have a god damned RIGHT to share in the social experience. Stop treating your audience like the bad guys, and stop talking secret wars behind our backs like we’re too stupid to see what you’re up to. Guys like Rivkin need to go. They’re the old dying model.

Adapt or die.

The Hacker Manifesto – 1986

Re-published here, without permission.

WordPress: Relocate ‘Menus’ & ‘Widgets’

Content Management System

WordPress is a Content Management System, or ‘CMS’. Content Management Systems were invented as a sort of expansion on stylesheets. The primary purpose of a CMS is to simplify the organization of website content, and it’s relationship to your website’s styling or “theme”.

Separating Content from Design

WordPress does a pretty good job of organizing your content. Theme configuration options are under Appearance, and Content is under Pages and Posts, but there is a catch.

If you want to edit the navigation menu on your site, or change the address in your footer widget, those are also located under Appearance. But those are content!

Solution: Relocate Menus & Widgets

The solution is a relatively simple one, Menus and Widgets should be moved out of Appearance. Each should be treated separately, or perhaps grouped together in a “Secondary Content” sub-menu.

Do you like this idea? Feel free to comment with your suggestions and share the idea with others.